Going back to work

On the eve of my return to my full-time job, I find myself reflecting on the last 3 months.

Things I will miss about maternity leave:

• 7am yoga. I would get up, drink some water, and hit the mat for 30 minutes while Emmett laid on the floor and Graham watched cartoons.
• (Mostly) keeping up with housework. It's not EASY but easier when you have all day.
• Dinner by 6pm. When you have all afternoon to prep dinner, it's easier to get it on the table by 6.
• Baby snuggles. Enough said.
• Afternoon naps. But if I'm being honest, I only took consistent naps those first 4 weeks. Then the boys started alternating nap schedules.
• Lunch dates with my mom.
• Yoga pants.

Things that scare me about the transition:

• Emmett's dislike of the bottle. Talk about working mother anxiety.
• Evening crankiness. Graham gets super jazzed when he's tired. Emmett gets fussy. And I just get cranky. 7:30pm in our house is not fun, and it's about to get worse.  
• The 100 bags I have to pack each day, including, but not limited to my lunch, Graham's lunch, Emmett's bottles, Emmett's diaper bag, Graham's gear bag, my laptop back, my pump, my gym bag...
• Lack of sleep. Emmett was starting to sleep longer such that he would go to bed with me around 10 and only get up once. Now he's going to sleep earlier (yay!) but that means getting up around midnight and again around 3. And sometimes more frequently. I will have to get up around 5:45/6:00 to get myself and my bags ready. I'm already tired. It's about to get worse. Which might amplify the aforementioned evening cranky. 

Things I am looking forward to about going back to work.

• Being with other adults. Thank goodness for my mom this maternity leave, because the loneliness of staying home with my littles was starting to become oppressive. 
• Having a routine. Not that it's always the same, but I feel a little more organized when working.
• Mental challenges. As opposed to the emotional ones posed to me by my children. Not that I never get emotional at work...
• Dressing like a person who has some semblance of her act together. In other words, not wearing yoga pants.