Leaving on a jet plane

I'm not going to lie: I'm scared shitless about flying with my son.  I just am.  If you're a mom who has never obsessed about something that in retrospect turns out to be nothing, then I totally envy and admire you.  My ability to obsess knows no bounds.  Throughout my pregnancy, I obsessed about so many things - the size of my growing belly and kick count to figuring out how feed the baby and walk Cooper all in the same morning.  I was so so so stressed about our morning routine, and that turned out to be one of the easiest parts of our day!  I spent most of this spring obsessing about our evening schedule (which was totally not fine for a while) and about how much food to give our son.  About how much structure was too much structure.  About what would and would not establish a lifetime of bad habits.  Most nights we both ended up in tears, with Jeff frustrated by the whole scenario.  So yeah - my need for control, of the known and the unknown, usually means I over think, over plan, over react.

Hopefully, this trip to Portland will have the same happy endings as our morning routine.  I'm not sure how I could possibly be any more prepared.  I have Googled "travel with baby" so many times and now have read perhaps every iteration of how to keep your toddler occupied while on a plane that my head is spinning.  What we have working against us is that we did not purchase him his own seat (which is a large reason why we're even taking this trip in the first place: free flight).  Strike two: that I am wound very tightly and need to relax so I don't project my anxiety on Graham.  What we have going for us: I am a super packer (thank you, job in Admissions).  Here's what I am planning to bring in our Graham-pack (assuming I can fit it all):

• SNACKS!  Lots and lots of snacks.  Applesauce pouches, cheddar bunnies, nutrigrain bars, Cheerios, Sweet Potato Crisps, blueberries.  I think we should be covered.
• I will also collapse the boxes that these came in to be reassembled on the plane.  Kids love boxes, and Graham is no exception.
• Milk.  In an insulated Camelbak, with separate sippy cup.  (the TSA agent in GR last week assured me I could bring this through security.  If not, I am not above whipping up some tears - you just can't get soy milk in airport gift shops).  Water I can buy once through security.
• Pipe cleaners.  Apparently kids love them.  They are also cheap and easy to pack.  Kids can also thread Cheerios on pipecleaners, which allows them to work on their fine motor skills!
• Painters tape.  I guess kids love tape.  Blue painters tape is also easy to remove without leaving residue.  Again, it's cheap and easy to pack.
• Jumbo crayons and pad of paper.
• Favorite books (which currently includes Little Blue Truck and How Do Dinosaurs Love Their Dogs?)
• Playdoh.  I wanted silly putty, but neither Meijer nor Target carries it.  WTF?
• Back up clothes.  For everyone.  
• Blankets.

When this trip is successful (yep, I wrote when.  I'm being optimistic.  Or something like that.), I will be sure to tell you about it.  If it's a big fat disaster, you will hear about it in great detail.  Now wish me luck.  Or send me some Xanax.  (BTW - Dramamine for kids is not suitable for kids under 2.  My doctor says do not give it to him.  There goes my back-up plan.)