Last week on leave...

...and I'm feeling a little bittersweet.  A few weeks ago, I was very anxious to get back to work.  Graham was crabby, I was crabby....I didn't feel like I was accomplishing anything other than running errands (many of which were rather pointless).  I was itching to do...something.  Well, now Graham is getting to be more of a little person.  He smiles, he coos, he kicks, he looks around...and he's on a routine!  Not quite a schedule yet, but a pretty good routine.  So during the day, I'm actually able to do stuff I enjoy - I'm exercising, I'm crafting, I'm cooking....and I feel happier as a result.  So now I'm less ready to go back to work, but next Wednesday, that's just what I'm going to do.

I haven't done all I thought I was going to do on this leave.  I had this grand vision of being able to craft and explore, and I just haven't done that and now with only a week left, I feel like there is so much I want to do!!!  Granted, I'll have weekends, but still....I never made it to a museum, I never started (or even shopped for) that quilt project I've had in my head for months, I didn't explore GR like I thought I would.  Sigh.

BUT - I painted my bedroom.  I refinished 2 dressers.  I put the finishing touches on a wall hanging for my office that I started almost a year ago.  I made a baby gift.  I went to a weekly moms support group which was awesome.  And most importantly, I spent time with my son.

So I'm going to try to find the positives.  Graham and I are doing good together now and I think he actually knows me.  I don't hate breastfeeding anymore.  And going back to work will allow me to see my friends again and to work out at lunch.  There are always, as I said earlier, the weekends to do the things I thought I was going to do these last 10 weeks.


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