It's been one week

One long week.  I was due last Monday and here I am today no baby.  I'm trying very hard to be patient and enjoy life sans infant.  But I'm just so ready to start figuring out how to live my life as a mom!

Today marks my first day "on leave."  This was a very hard decision to come by and even though I had pretty much decided I'd stay home even without baby this week, I still was a little undecided as of yesterday.  I knew Jeff was concerned about my drive and what sealed the deal for me was him saying that he'd be so disappointed if things progressed so quickly while I was in Kalamazoo that he missed the birth of his baby.  The look on his face even thinking about that disappointment made me realize that this is not just about me.  So here I am at home.

This morning is off to rough start as I fell walking Cooper this morning.  I know he can't help it that he hates rabbits - basset hounds were bred to hunt rabbits.  But something has got to give.  He sees/smells a rabbit and he goes CRAZY - barking, pulling, spinning, running...So this morning he was on my right and a rabbit popped out from a bush on the left.  He starts his spazzing, I tried to keep him to my right and keep walking.  But he had just enough slack on the leash to pull forward and cut in front of me, and I came toppling down.  I used my hands to brace the fall and tumbled on him.  He yelped, but seems to be fine, as I think I had slowed myself down enough and rolled to the side that I didn't totally squash him.  Of course I instantly burst into panicked tears that I have hurt the baby and hurt the dog.  A lady popped her head out of her house and asked if I was ok - I responded through tears I was fine....you'd think she would have just offered to help anyways.  In reality the only person that was hurt was me - not badly, but my hand was scraped up and bleeding and sore, my knee was sore.  I got myself up and cried the whole way home.  I cleaned out my hand and called Jeff.  The baby has been moving a lot since then, so I think he's fine.  I have a doctor's appointment anyways this afternoon.  Cooper pretty much cushioned the belly, otherwise I probably would be calling for an earlier appointment.  Part of what freaks me out is the thought of using the baby bjorn to walk with the baby and Cooper.  If I fall like that with the baby outside me, the baby could really be hurt!!!  Either I only use the stroller when walking Cooper OR I break Cesar's rules and just let Cooper go crazy on the leash without trying to control him.  If I had let him just run forward with full leash extension, I wouldn't have fallen.  Cooper is a good boy, but the thought of the baby getting hurt because of those god damn rabbits makes me sick.

So I guess it's just as well I'm not working today.  I shouldn't be typing - it actually hurts my hand.  My knees are bruised.  I think I'm going to take a bath and then chill out a little.  I'll be calling for acupuncture...perhaps I can get in today and just have an afternoon of appointments (with a Wealthy Street cookie break somewhere in the middle).

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